Have you ever taken one of those personality tests? As a counselor, I absolutely love personality testing of all types. I don’t do much of this in my clinical time, but give me a test to take, and I will drop everything in order to get it done! This week an online Myers Briggs assessment has been circulating on Facebook, and I could. not. resist. You can check it out here.
I wasn’t surprised by my results. I’ve taken it a thousand times… it’s always the same. ENFP: Extroverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Perceiving. Here’s a brief overview of the highlights: “ENFPs are warm, enthusiastic people, typically very bright and full of potential. They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things. Their enthusiasm lends them the ability to inspire and motivate others, more so than we see in other types. They can talk their way in or out of anything. They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most out of it.”
Every time I read this section (or one similar to it), I smile. Who wouldn’t want to be considered very bright and full of potential? And with an added bonus of an ability to motivate others? What more could a girl ask for? Plus, we can apparently talk [our] way in or out of anything. This little gem comes in quite handy when you’re facing something like say oh, I don’t know, a speeding ticket. One time, I literally TALKED my way into an “A” on the final in my college math class. Let me tell you, this was not earned based on skill… So wrong.
And then I got to this part. “An ENFP who has ‘gone wrong’ may be quite manipulative – and very good it. The gift of gab which they are blessed with makes it naturally easy for them to get what they want.” Who? Me? Never! Um, well maybe sometimes. Not so flattering.
Here’s the deal. We all have personality tendencies – for better or worse. There are characteristics that make us unique… parts we would consider to be strengths. But each one of us has a shadow side. We all have the ability to use our powers for good or for evil. I’m pretty sure that God saw this one coming from a mile away. He spent so much time creating us – forming us in our mother’s womb. I believe He delights in us… in our differences… in our uniqueness. But I also think that’s one reason He is so clear about things like judgment and wisdom. In Proverbs we read over and over again about these ideas. Take a look at Proverbs 4.
“My children, listen when your father corrects you. Pay attention and learn good judgment, for I am giving you good guidance. Don’t turn away from my instructions… Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment… My child, pay attention to what I say.
Listen carefully to my words. Don’t lose sight of them. Let them penetrate deep into your heart, for they bring life to those who find them, and healing to their whole body. Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.“
On our own, we are easily led astray. Even with the best of intentions we can get a bit turned around. We need the wisdom and understanding that comes from God. But how do we hear from God? I would suggest that there are several ways to keep ourselves in check.
First things first, prayer. Ask God for wisdom and understanding… He’ll give it freely. (James 1:5)
Second step, scripture. (2 Timothy 3:16) One of the ways we can keep ourselves in line is to see if our instincts/ intuition/ good ideas line up with God’s word. This a natural kind of checks-and-balances. If you’re getting conflicting prayer/ scripture messages, HOLD UP.
Invite friends to provide accountability. Find people you TRUST and let them in on the parts of your life that aren’t so pretty. That sounds pretty crazy, right? I’m serious. Allow certain friends to call you on your stuff. Ask them if they see wisdom and sound judgment in your choices. Trust me, a group of honest friends is a good thing. (Proverbs 24:26)
Seek wise counsel counseling. Let me say this as politely as I can. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD, GET HELP. (Was that gentle and kind? I think so. Let’s keep going.) There are so many counselors… GOOD counselors… CHRISTIAN counselors… PROFESSIONAL counselors who want to walk with you. Some of us even know a thing or two about emotionally healthy spirituality. There are so many things in life that are confusing and just plain HARD. If you’re in over your head, ask for help.
Personality tests are fun. But people who don’t understand their personality and use it irresponsibly are not. It’s great to learn about ourselves and to learn about those we’re in relationship with, but let’s all agree to dig a little deeper… do the hard work of soul-searching… face the shadows. Most things are a whole lot less scary when they’re brought into The Light.
missihippie 